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Joe and I decided to get better at Scrabble.  We’ve played a bunch of practice games and started to memorize the two and three letter words.  Despite this, Chris Fosmire pwned us, partly due to his invented word “THROTLE”, I saw the tiles go down and assumed there was a third T.  I’ll never trust my boss again.

Anyway, after an amazing game of three-at-once words, Q’s on triple letter scores in two directions the scores still barely broke 200 (intermediate players should hit 500 to 700).  In a last ditch effort, we lasted two hours at Teejay Green’s playing two enraging games.  I had the tiles AAEIRTS and I knew there was a seven letter word in there.  After three minutes of staring, I played ATRIA for a whopping 12 points only to find today that ATRESIA would have have net me 76.  If someone had pointed it out to me, Joe and Teejay would have been picking wood out of their teeth.

Words hard.

Joe and I are looking for something new to become obsessed with, preferably something easier to become skilled at like sepak takraw (great video) or Sanskrit (good comic).

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SimStapler is quite possibly one of the dumbest applications for the iPhone.  You press the stapler on screen, and it plays an animation of someone using a red swingline stapler.  Every 10 presses, a woman’s voice says “splendid!”  I’ve currently pressed it about 4000 times and everyone who sees it call me an idiot; until they try to see how fast they can use it.

Teejay Green challenged Sam Lodise to a friendly competition of who could get to 50 first.  Teejay got 50 presses in 22.23 seconds where Sam beat him out narrowly at 22.18 seconds.  Teejay had knocked back a few beers at this point and what I assumed was a friendly competition was not: Upon learning of his loss at an utterly pointless game Teejay said the following:  “You cock-sucking mother-fucking Chinese bastard”.

This is why I don’t drink.  In other news, Teejay stated to me that he’d pay me 10 dollars if by 2018 he didn’t have a personal fusion generator in his basement.  With God and the blogosphere as my witness, I will have my 10 dollars.

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I like to sing.  Sometimes this has worked in my favor while other times it has not.  Teejay Green, Val Green and I went out to dinner at La Fontana in Hatboro and after having chicken that made Gunnery Sgt. Hartman seem tender we walked back to my car and I was singing the opening few bars of Rhapsody in Blue, which has that pimp clarinet glissando in the beginning.  I was getting louder and louder until I rounded the corner of the restaurant and ran into a member of the wait crew who I’m sure though I was drunk as I figured I may as well sing louder.  On the way out, to prove that I may be an idiot, but at least a popular idiot, Teejay and I sang Petula Clark’s “Downtown” at the top of our lungs as we left the restaurant and raced through Hatboro.

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I like to sing.  Sometimes this has worked in my favor while other times it has not.  Teejay Green, Val Green and I went out to dinner at La Fontana in Hatboro and after having chicken that made Gunnery Sgt. Hartman seem tender we walked back to my car and I was singing the opening few bars of Rhapsody in Blue, which has that pimp clarinet glissando in the beginning.  I was getting louder and louder until I rounded the corner of the restaurant and ran into a member of the wait crew who I’m sure though I was drunk as I figured I may as well sing louder.  On the way out, to prove that I may be an idiot, but at least a popular idiot, Teejay and I sang Petula Clark’s “Downtown” at the top of our lungs as we left the restaurant and raced through Hatboro.

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After the Camporee, Teejay Green, Valerie Green and I got together for gravity ribs at the Churchville Inn.  It was 6:58 and I needed to be there by 7 PM, so needless to say, I was early.  I got a table and while waiting dicked around with my new IR thermometer shooting various things around my room and discovered that while my normal drink at home with 3 small ice cubes is 38°F on average, a full glass of ice yields soda closer to 33°F.  Anyway, while waiting, I listened to the conversation at the table next to me that had apparently just learned that Dumbledore was gay when the kid piped up and said “Next we’ll find our that Harry’s a damn Jew.”

Remember, start your kids down the road of life-long projectionism with an early dose of anti-Semitism….