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Bob Tait invited me to his Halloween Party and I was excited to one, try a costume, two see Bob Tait for the first time in several years. Since last we saw each other, he switched jobs, got married, rented a house, and apparently developed a love for high end bourbon. Suzie was an impressive zombie Pikachu, I was Spiderman, Jeff was… Jeff and we headed over.

The theme for the party was Arnold Swartzenegger movies and roughly half of the costumed attendees met this requirement. A few people picked up on the fact that I was Spiderman including a couple dressed as characters from The Hangover. We got talking and they commented on my costume.

Him: Hey, you’re a camera guy, what do you think about having a wedding where we just pass out disposable cameras?
Me: That can turn out well, but it’s usually good to have someone there dedicated to getting certain group shots.
Him: But I don’t care about those.
Me: But your family does.
Her: See, listen to Spiderman.
Him: But photographers are so expensive.
Me: How much are you paying if I may ask?
Him: .
Me: I’d do it for about $500 less and that includes with my assistant.
Him: You have an assistant?
Me: Zombie Pikachu.
Her: We could have Pikachu and Spiderman as our wedding photographers?
Me: Yes, here’s my card.
Him: What are you doing in this picture?
Me: Riding a concrete sheep. I look forward to working with you.

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For the first time in 16 years, when last I was a refrigerator, I made a Halloween costume. The idea came out of attending comic book conventions and not being much able to get into the spirit of the event as I was just a civilian. So who combines comic books and photography? Peter Parker.

The costume consisted of a dress shirt, slacks, a press badge, and my camera all on top of a standard Spiderman costume. I think it turned out well.

From 2012-10-26 Bob Tait’s Halloween Party

I got to remove an item from my “Reasons I’m Tired of Being Fat” list: Fit into a store bought Halloween costume.

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Compared to the rest of Lower Southampton Township I live in the middle of nowhere.  Halloween as a child involved renting a friend’s neighborhood and trying to avoid apples, Good ‘n’ Plentys, and Necco Wafers.  My brother purchased a house this past winter and he was excited to celebrate his first Halloween where he’d dispense rather than strictly gather candy.

I was over early in the evening to drop off some stuff but hung around to notice a trend.  He started off with a pirate hat on and demanded each kid say “Trick or Treat”.  He complained about the hat and stopped wearing it but still excitedly answered the door and demanded the candy pass phrase.  After another hour he’d simply hand the bowl of candy out the door and only demand “Trick or Treat” from kids over 12.  I didn’t stay long enough to see the candy dish left on his stoop with a white flag in it.

Who knew Halloween wasn’t a holiday but an endurance trial?

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Normally, there’s a few people at work in dumb Halloween costumes.  Today, I saw none.  There was recently a wave of firings.  I wonder if I discovered their decision criterion.  I approve.

As a Haiku:
No costumes at work/
Wave of wrath may be the cause/
I approve of this.

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In IH 0051 we’ve been reading the Old Testiment and to win the frequent Biblical pissing matching I’ve been toting the 14 lb. Oxford New Revised Standard Version (with Apocrypha) around Temple. This isn’t too odd as based on my size it looks like I’m a smaller person perusing Reader’s Digest. While reading Genesis I’ve had the score to Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat running through my head and I finally got my umbrella back after 3 weeks of use by some smelly-pirate hooker for which I felt sorry in my stat class. After class, I mount the R3 to go home and there are infinite people, mostly in shitty costumes, and there’s no place to sit. So, I’m standing there reading the giant Bible humming show tunes carrying an umbrella on a clear 70° day on Halloween in shorts and sandals with socks when I notice everyone around backing away and getting quiet. I’m used to this to a certain extent as there is a certain surreal quality to a 380lb man whistling on a train, but the clincher was when I made eye contact with a 10 year old dressed as a skeleton leans over to his mother and lips the words “he’s weird”. Welcome to Philadelphia, kids.

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In IH 0051 we’ve been reading the Old Testiment and to win the frequent Biblical pissing matching I’ve been toting the 14 lb. Oxford New Revised Standard Version (with Apocrypha) around Temple. This isn’t too odd as based on my size it looks like I’m a smaller person perusing Reader’s Digest. While reading Genesis I’ve had the score to Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat running through my head and I finally got my umbrella back after 3 weeks of use by some smelly-pirate hooker for which I felt sorry in my stat class. After class, I mount the R3 to go home and there are infinite people, mostly in shitty costumes, and there’s no place to sit. So, I’m standing there reading the giant Bible humming show tunes carrying an umbrella on a clear 70° day on Halloween in shorts and sandals with socks when I notice everyone around backing away and getting quiet. I’m used to this to a certain extent as there is a certain surreal quality to a 380lb man whistling on a train, but the clincher was when I made eye contact with a 10 year old dressed as a skeleton leans over to his mother and lips the words “he’s weird”. Welcome to Philadelphia, kids.