Scavanging is a well tested past time of both the R&D and CAD group and having moved from one to the other I’m noting the differences in methodologies.  In R&D we walked around the building a lot and saw meetings in progress, we’d pass this information on and everytime someone got a drink or used the rest room the target room would be checked until it evacuated and much like the muezzin of a medieval mosque the returning person would issue a call to the congregants to find sustenance.

The CAD group is much more ant-like with each member monitoring a specific area of the building as part of their normal duties.  The smoker checks the area between the offices and the front desk, the always-on-cellphone guy monitors the bathrooms to the secret room in the stairwell, the businessy guy monitors the secretaries’ desks and the mad designer checks everything as he storms about talking to people.  When one returned with the food the rest of the group knew their covered region and would keep circling until they found it.  Once someone returned without food, that person would emit a pheramone that would signal the other ants that the supply was exhausted.

Today, the smoker returned with pizza and based on the plate it was from a marketing meeting which is usually held in a specific room.  I went to the conference room and the kitchen manager was there reclaiming paper plates and unconsumed singles like drink cans and bags of chips, but he stopped me from taking pizza.

He told me he was going to bring it back to the kitchen to “prevent waste”.  Really?  Have we really be reduced to re-heating pizza?  I mean, he’s the kitchen manager, if he really wanted pizza he could just have pizza, he wouldn’t have to deprive us of it to get it.  How do you recycle pizza?  Is he going to make pizza cream soup just like one time he made “fish” chowder followed by cream of starch soup?  If he slices them up to create the delightfully ambiguous “cheesy fiesta strips” I’m going to picket.

Scavanging is a well tested past time of both the R&D and CAD group and having moved from one to the other I’m noting the differences in methodologies.  In R&D we walked around the building a lot and saw meetings in progress, we’d pass this information on and everytime someone got a drink or used the rest room the target room would be checked until it evacuated and much like the muezzin of a medieval mosque the returning person would issue a call to the congregants to find sustenance.

The CAD group is much more ant-like with each member monitoring a specific area of the building as part of their normal duties.  The smoker checks the area between the offices and the front desk, the always-on-cellphone guy monitors the bathrooms to the secret room in the stairwell, the businessy guy monitors the secretaries’ desks and the mad designer checks everything as he storms about talking to people.  When one returned with the food the rest of the group knew their covered region and would keep circling until they found it.  Once someone returned without food, that person would emit a pheramone that would signal the other ants that the supply was exhausted.

Today, the smoker returned with pizza and based on the plate it was from a marketing meeting which is usually held in a specific room.  I went to the conference room and the kitchen manager was there reclaiming paper plates and unconsumed singles like drink cans and bags of chips, but he stopped me from taking pizza.

He told me he was going to bring it back to the kitchen to “prevent waste”.  Really?  Have we really be reduced to re-heating pizza?  I mean, he’s the kitchen manager, if he really wanted pizza he could just have pizza, he wouldn’t have to deprive us of it to get it.  How do you recycle pizza?  Is he going to make pizza cream soup just like one time he made “fish” chowder followed by cream of starch soup?  If he slices them up to create the delightfully ambiguous “cheesy fiesta strips” I’m going to picket.

I went out for ribs with my mother and was a bit overdressed for the “Duck Deli” as I had come straight from work.  The ribs were a bit fatty and I knew Max (our dog) would love it so I asked for a doggie bag.  The server looked at me quizzically so I repeated the request calling it a meat shrapnel bag and she nodded her head.  The server returned with a paper-fucking-bag.  So, I did what anyone in my position would do: I loaded the meat into the bag and poured the dipping butter for the hush puppies on top for good measure.  As the bag became saturated I began putting the bag on the chairs leaving nice butter marks and whipped my mouth with the curtains on the way out.  As the bag neared breaking I asked for another bag and got a 10 gallon trash bag.  This is my new favorite restaurant.

I purchased a chicken cheesesteak today from the local Quikchek or what ever butchered spelling it uses and was miffed when I got the wrong sandwich.

Me: This is a turkey grinder, I ordered the chicken cheesesteak.
Sandwich Lady:  We’re out of chicken, so I switched it with another meat from the same animal.

He reasoning was so flawless I couldn’t argue.

The 2nd day of the 5 day meeting marathon went down today and again, around 6 PM there was a cornucopia of coffees, drinks, individual serving cakes and cheeses including what tasted like peppered mozzarella (genius!)  I enter the room and shortly afterwards a facilities fellow walked in, presumably to change some ceiling lights, and I offered him some of the bounty to which he responded “I’m like a mouse, I might have some Swiss cheese”.  I carry out six or seven cans of soda and return to find the food trays stripped.  All the food is completely gone and even the utensils and tea bags had been taken.  Yeah, mouse-like, a mouse with a forklift.

A co-worker mentioned she’d bought 15 pounds of cereal from a bulk foods distributor, after I stopped laughing thinking about a 15 lb bag of Wheaties I poked around for a distributor and found bulkfoods.com and checking in their dried fruit section found the section divided into Sulfured and Non-Sulfured Fruits.  That makes me feel safe.

I think their candy section should be “with small razor sharp metal bits and without small razor sharp metal bits”.