Him: So do you feel better having lost all that weight?
Me: No, not really. My endurance is much higher but I don’t feel more energetic.
Him: What about down there?
Me: What do you mean?
Him: They say for every 35 lbs you lose your dong gets an inch larger.
Me: Well, considering I’ve lost 195 lbs and don’t have a penis fit for use as a whiffle ball bat I’d say that may be an untrue claim.
Him: Oh.